I’ve never been particularly good with measurements. Throughout my late teens and early twenties, I’m sure men thought I was perfect because my perception of an inch was way off, so needless to say I was easily impressed. I say this because there’s one factor that’s going to very slightly hinder this review, and that factor is size.
It’s the same thing that got me into trouble with my too-big Pure Plug, which I try so hard to love but I’m just not feeling it in return. When Sex Wooden Toys reached out to me, they asked which toy I wanted and what size, so this is no one’s fault but my own, and perhaps in part to a poor public school math education. I chose the large Afrodite from Sex Wooden Toys, thinking I like many other “large” toys, but not taking into account the inflexible material or, y’know, what an inch really looks like. Size Queens can rejoice because DANG she’s a big ‘un, but my vagina is merely a Size Princess In Waiting.
So, my inadequacies pushed aside, here is what I thought of Afrodite.
She’s pretty, needless to say. This was my first experience with a wooden toy, and I was quite excited to round out my sex toy materials of plastic, silicone, glass, metal, and now wood. Of course, it has to be quality wood and polished the perfect amount that it doesn’t flake off (AKA cooch splinter) or absorb all your lube, but when it comes to a company that makes solely wooden toys, I trust that they know what they’re doing. You’ll be happy to know that I did avoid a cooch splinter, and this toy is very well made and looks great. The rings on the wood show through in a perfect row on every bulge, creating a beautiful pattern and proving the beauty that can be created from a single piece of wood.
I chose Afrodite because I’d recently discovered that this bubbled-type shape was rather pleasurable and as someone who typically dislikes texture, this had to be investigated further. Of course, with the size problem I’ll never be sure how pleasurable this particular shape can be, but after using it, I’m pretty sure I’d like it in a smaller size.
However I don’t think the only problem is the size. When I first looked at the selection of dildos from Sex Wooden Toys, I noticed two things, one of which is the fact that they are all straight. Correct me if I’m wrong, but not many people have a straight vagina, so an unwieldily block of wood in a straight line may not work for everyone. However, I know straight toys work for some people – it’s why trying to find a curved glass toy is difficult for me, and why one of my favourite glass dildos is straight and purely ornamental. Basically, putting this inside me was fine (after some warm up), but once the first bulb or two were in, I felt the need to take a sharp turn that I just wasn’t able to take, meaning it was frequently rubbing against my pubic bone (again, the size didn’t help).
The second thing I noticed is that none of them are anal safe. Afrodite’s shape looks great for anal use, and if it had been anal safe, I probably would have gotten the smaller size and saved myself the whole hassle of squeezing a large peg into a small hole. Given that these toys look like they were made on a lathe, it seems to me that adding an anal-safe base shouldn’t be too difficult, and I hope to see this addition on future dildos.
In sum, the toy was really well made, and with a few small design tweaks, I think it’d be a really versatile toy that I could enjoy. However, I do have some concerns about the detail of the wood – I noticed as I was taking photos that the wood has small imperfections that show as small holes in the toy. I guess my concern is cleanliness, since I doubt I can ever truly get those tiny little holes clean. I’m not sure how it can be avoided, but it’s certainly something to consider.
This product was provided by Sex Wooden Toys in exchange for my honest review. All opinions are my own and un-biased. Thank you to Sex Wooden Toys for their contribution.