It was a beauty. I had of course seen photos of the Parisian-style packaging that embraced the clean, soft silicone form (primarily because mine took a month to ship). Vibrating G-spot toys may not be my drug of choice these days, but I do love a good one to dabble with once in a while, and I can’t deny that with the right clitoral stimulation, they get the job done.
I ooo’d and aww’d at the beautiful packaging before caressing the soft, black silicone and noticing how easy it was to bend the sensuous curved shape. Two small buttons adorned the bottom – power and vibration settings – with a rubber-covered charging port to ensure its waterproof status. After a few minutes of charging, I hit the power button and… nothing. That’s weird. Clicked again, and again, nothing. Great, I got a broken vibrator, after all that waiting.
As I turned over the vibrator in my hand continuously, lamenting my bad luck, I peeked into the still-open charging port and saw… was that a red light? Checked the outside of the vibe and nothing, but sure enough, there was a little red glow emitting from the charging port. It must work! This time I hit the vibration button and it sprang to life!
Seriously? The vibrator has a power indicator light that’s nearly invisible. One day I’d be half tempted to tear the thing apart to see if the original design, sans silicone, originally included this feature, but in the meantime, come ON.
Now that the vibrator had found its mojo, I couldn’t help but be bowled over by how strong the vibrations were. Not quite Magic Wand material, but certainly stronger than any other vibrator in my collection, especially in that price range. I was excited by the prospect. When it finally came time to use it though, my dreams were shattered.
I’ll start with the good; the vibrations ARE strong, and on the lowest setting (which is all I could stand), they’re kind of rumbly. However once you progress into medium/high territory, it’s like my genitals are being lasered off. Strong vibrations, yes, but after a few seconds I can barely feel my genitals – classic sign of buzzy.
And to that effect comes my biggest criticism – the handle, or lack thereof. Because the vibrations are out of this world, about 80% of them can be felt in the tiny handle (the one inch area where the buttons are a bit too easily pressed). Trying to masturbate with the energizer bunny between my legs was distracting enough, but having my hand buzz along with it meant a numbing sensation and a pretty decent loss of focus. I’ll cut to the conclusion here: I did not have an orgasm from internal stimulation. The handle needs to be longer and include an extra form of stimulation to make sure its awesome vibrations don’t end up radiating through my arm.
The only orgasm I did have with it (and believe me, it wasn’t from a lack of trying) was clitorally. Much like a Magic Wand, intense vibrations are a clit’s best friend, so after a couple tries, it did get the job done, and my vulva did appreciate it. However the lovely bendable silicone that I earlier revered was a problem when it came to pressing down on the clit for any real pressure, meaning I had to have my hand on the tip, buzzing away.
Other problems include the fact that the buttons are SO easy to control, that there really should be a travel lock included. It’s not like I can just take out the batteries on the road, and god knows I have no idea when it’s actually turned on. In fact because I’m not sure if I’ve hit the power button, and there’s no real indicator to tell me so, I think the battery life suffers dramatically. Either that or charging it all day for a collective half hour of use is actually standard – I don’t like either answer.
Lastly, right after I shot these photos and gave it a charge for use later on, the USB charging cable caught on the waterproof rubber charging cover and ripped it off, meaning not only can my Audre not be submerged, but I can barely wash it without pouring water directly into the device. On the bright side, the USB charger does come with a nicely branded wall base, and that’s more than I can say for most rechargeables.
This product was provided by Blush Novelties in exchange for my honest review. All opinions are my own and un-biased. Thank you to Blush for their contribution.